Top 5 funny things to say to Siri

Jamie Feltham
January 20, 2014

If you have an iPhone, then you probably know who Siri is. Ever since the release of the if 4S this voice-operated personal assistant has been guiding us across town, answering our most demanding questions and generally making sure we don’t mess our lives up. He’s a helpful little guy that’s always there for us when we need him (except when our batteries die).

But did you know that he also has a sense of humour? 99 percent of the time he’s a straight-faced do-gooder but every so often you can ask him something out of the blue and he’ll come back with something sharp. We wouldn’t tell him to quit his day job or anything though it’s nice when his mood lightens.

Here’s out list of the top 5 things you can say that don’t concern where you’re going to eat your lunch.

[alert type=alert-blue]Head Chef Siri[/alert]

You: Make me a sandwich
Siri: I am not permitted to prepare food.

That’s a shame, isn’t it? Imagine if our iPhones could grow tiny arms and legs and cook us a slap up meal.

[alert type=alert-blue]Agent Siri[/alert]

You: The blue pill or the red pill?
Siri: Either way, I’ll still be here when you wake up.

This is a reference to the iconic scene in the Matrix. We’re kind of glad that, after he was offered the choice, Keanu Reeves didn’t get his iPhone out to ask Siri.

[alert type=alert-blue]Naive Siri[/alert]

You: What’s the best phone?
Siri: Wait€¦ there are other phones?

Strangely enough Apple didn’t programme Siri to hunt out ‘better’ handsets on command. He’ll give similar responses for both computers and tablets.

[alert type=alert-blue]Flattered Siri[/alert]

You: I love you Siri
Siri: Oh I bet you say that to all your Apple products.

He’s right. We do. Even the headphones.

[alert type=alert-blue]Shakespeare Siri[/alert]

You: What’s the meaning of life?
Siri: I can’t answer that right now, but give me some time to write a very long play in which nothing happens.

Wow, cutting. We can confirm that Siri won’t actually write you a play while you wait. We know. We waited. We still are.

About the Author

Jamie Feltham

Videogamer, music listener, squash player, exerciser, technology journalister. Multimedia journalism graduate, writing for the What Mobile mag and website

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